I am going to be sick.
I feel like I'm failing God right now and nothing I'm doing seems to be helping. My prayers seem futile and my faith is weak. As soon as something seems to come close to happening, it all comes crashing back down again. One of my friends is going to go to hell and nothing I'm saying is changing that in the least. Nothing coming from me is helping him believe. I feel physically ill with anxiety. We come so close to getting somewhere, and then he asks one simple question that rocks me. I stumble, and his defensive shield is back up in a flash. He needs proof. Proof he can see and touch. I don't have that. He wants answers. Solid, concrete answers. And I can't give them to him.
All I can do is sit here and try and figure out what to say to keep him from turning completely away, even if he's not willing to accept. All I can do is sit here and cry like an idiot who doesn't have the answers he needs to hear. All I can do is sit here and pray and hope and have faith that God has it under control.
But it's so hard...
2 comments:
chelsea thinks will work out. i know it doesn't seem like it now but god will not leave you all alone. he loves you and he isn't going to give up on you so don't give up on him. i will be praying for you and this situation. i really hope things will work out. i love you chels and things will be okay. even if it doesn't seem like it now.
You've told him about Christ, you've done all the things you can to help him. It now comes down to him to make the decision...whether or not he makes the right one is something different. I think that all you can do right now is pray and wait. God will help you on his time not yours. Sometimes you just have to be patient and I know that's kind of hypocritical for me to say because i'm not very patient but sometimes that's how things work out. I will be praying for you so that when the time does come you will have the words for him so that he might understand and believe. I love you lots :)
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